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anon1Mus

[anonimu™]



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(since 02-04-2022 14:33)
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          anonymus.stand 
Post Posted: 02-03-2013, 17:32:28 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
Doctore, am probleme mari! Fac dragoste cu soþia mea ore în ºir pânã îmi pierd puterile, ea are orgasme multiple, eu nimic! Ajutor!
- Rezolvãm, nu e dificil... De ce sunteþi atât de speriat? De ce vã tot uitaþi în jur?
- Soþia mi-a spus: "Dacã te duci la doctor, te omor!"

'' Întinde o mânã , oferã , ajutã
Primeºte , ascultã , taci si luptã ''

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-bebeto-

[Freakz * -carmen-]



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Post Posted: 02-03-2013, 17:59:00 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
Ion il intreaba pe Vasile:
- Bai Vasile ai facut vreodata sex in trei?
- Nu ma Ioane zice Vasile...
- Bai du-te repede acasa poate mai apuci....


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AndreeaLove

[Deea^_^for3v3r]



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Post Posted: 02-03-2013, 20:30:13 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
Intr-o zi, Ion ii face o vizita prietenului sau Gheorghe. Ajungand la casa acestuia, vede o placa mare la poarta: “”Caine rau! Intrati pe propria raspundere! Mai aveti timp sa va razganditi”"!. Ion intra in curte cu frica, dar nu apare nici un caine. La usa casei vede alta placa: “”CAINE RAU! Daca tineti la viata voastra, intoarceti-va acum”"!. Speriat de-a binelea, deschide usor usa si paseste in hol, unde il intampina Gheorghe. Intr-un colt, un caine apatic. – Servus, Gheo! Dar ce-i cu toate avertismentele astea, ca vad ca dulaul tau e foarte linistit? Nu ziceai ca-i rau? – Ii foarte rau, dar se consuma in el…

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-bebeto-

[Freakz * -carmen-]



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Post Posted: 02-03-2013, 23:16:09 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
Doamne, de ce ai facut femeia atat de frumoasa?
-Ca sa te poti indragosti de ea.
-Si de ce ai facut-o atat de buna?
-Ca sa te poti indragosti de ea.
-Dar, Doamne, de ce ai facut-o atat de proasta?
-Ca sa se poata indragosti de tine!

-


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Jim2012

[*SUD*]



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Post Posted: 03-03-2013, 01:28:33 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
Definitie: CELIBATAR
Barbat care poate avea mai multe femei pe genunchi, dar niciuna pe brate.
-


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-bebeto-

[Freakz * -carmen-]



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Post Posted: 03-03-2013, 09:20:51 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
Iubitul cãtre iubita prin sms :
- Aș face orice pentru tine. Aș trece prin foc, aș strãbate cele 7 mãri.
- Oh, ce drãguț. Vii la mine?
- Nu, cã plouã ! -


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AndreeaLove

[Deea^_^for3v3r]



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Post Posted: 03-03-2013, 14:19:50 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
Intr-o noapte Maria il intreaba pe Ion : – Ioane , dormi ? – Nu!– Ioane , tu ma iubesti ? – DORM.

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-bebeto-

[Freakz * -carmen-]



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Post Posted: 03-03-2013, 14:45:50 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
- Cat ti-au dat ?
- 20 de ani !
- Pentru ce ?
- Pentru o gaina !
- Cum asa ?
...- A scurmat a naibii si a dezgropat-o pe soacra-mea din fundul gradinii !!


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-P!C@-

[Simply Normal]



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Post Posted: 03-03-2013, 14:52:27 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
-Ieri soacra-mea a fost muscata de caine...
-Si cum se simte?
-Soacra-mea bine dar cainele a murit.



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-bebeto-

[Freakz * -carmen-]



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Post Posted: 03-03-2013, 15:44:22 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
-P!C@- wrote:
-Ieri soacra-mea a fost muscata de caine...
-Si cum se simte?
-Soacra-mea bine dar cainele a murit.


-)) -)



cea mai buna iala -))
http://img717.imageshack.us/img717/9646/60197449205280083137578.jpg


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AndreeaLove

[Deea^_^for3v3r]



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Post Posted: 03-03-2013, 15:59:40 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
Maria catre Ion: – Ion, iti miros picioarele! Ion, bucuros: – Miroase-le…

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-bebeto-

[Freakz * -carmen-]



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Post Posted: 03-03-2013, 16:02:04 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
Vine unu' la doctor:
- Doctore, nevasta ma inseala pe rupte si totusi nu imi apar nici un fel de coarne. Uitati-va si dvs, neted ca'n palma...
- Nu va faceti probleme, chestia cu coarnele e numai o vorba, nu exista cu adevarat.
- Uf, mi-ati luat o piatra de pe inima, credeam ca am lipsa de calciu...


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AndreeaLove

[Deea^_^for3v3r]



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Post Posted: 03-03-2013, 16:48:04 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
La tribunal, judecatorul: – Si vreti sa sustineti ca atunci ati crezut ca portmoneul gasit va apartine? – Portmoneul nu, dar bancnotele imi pareau cunoscute…

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-bebeto-

[Freakz * -carmen-]



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Post Posted: 03-03-2013, 19:13:54 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
S-a întâmplat un tragic accident,
Banal si pot sa zic chiar foarte rar,
Când soacra lu’ Ion (si el prezent)
Mortal, a fost lovita de magar;
Si-atâta jale pe bietul Ion
Si plânsete pe coana Maricica,
Încât în sapte sate s-a dat zvon:
Magaru’, a ucis-o pe mamica


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AndreeaLove

[Deea^_^for3v3r]



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Post Posted: 04-03-2013, 16:54:08 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)
Judecatorul intreaba martora: – Sunteti casatorita? Ea ofteaza. Judecatorul dicteaza secretarei: – Nu e casatorita. Apoi intreaba martorul: – Sunteti casatorit? Martorul ofteaza. Judecatorul dicteaza: – Casatorit.

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