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DeathLine

[Banal]



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Post Posted: 11-11-2013, 12:56:43 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)

DhaAlekz wrote:
Atunci eram ametit ma.. la betie fac mai frumos -

Atunci nu vreau sa stiu ce scoti din buzunare cand esti beat -




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-bebeto-

[Freakz * -carmen-]



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(since 19-03-2018 19:51)
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Post Posted: 13-11-2013, 21:25:51 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)

Vine Bula la scoala in doliu. Diriga il intreaba:
- De ce esti in doliu Bula?
- A murit tata.
- Cum asa? Era tanar, cum a murit?
- L-a calcat trenu' pe deget.
- Din asta nu se moare, sunt sigura!
- Doamna, avea degetu' in nas. -



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chetrue

[Unstoppable !!]



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Post Posted: 13-11-2013, 22:16:32 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)

Bulã este trimis de firmã sã vândã frigidere în Alaska. Peste o sãptãmânã mai cere 200 de frigidere, peste o lunã mai cere 2000 de frigidere. Atunci este sunat ºi întrebat cum reuºeºte sã vândã atâtea frigidere în Alaska.
El a rãspuns prompt:
-Ei, a fost mai greu la început, pânã i-am convins pe eschimoºi cã în frigider e mai cald decât afarã.



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-bebeto-

[Freakz * -carmen-]



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Post Posted: 15-11-2013, 18:21:29 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)

Campionatul mondial de furat:
- Proba finala - care echipa fura cele mai multe electronice in 30 de min. dintr-o hala castiga.
In finala au ajun echipele S.U.A , Franta si Romania.
Intra echipa S.U.A.: dupa 30 de minute de abia se cunostea daca intrase cineva.
Intra echipa Frantei: dupa 30 de minute se cunostea ceva ceva.
Intra echipa Romaniei iar dupa 5 minute iese unul si intreaba :
- Sefu, luam si prizele?



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DeathLine

[Banal]



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Post Posted: 20-11-2013, 17:02:06 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)





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MIT 29`

[``Th3 TaTTOoIsT`` ]



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Post Posted: 21-11-2013, 22:43:03 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)




Uite Pica Sa nu mai vorbeasca lumea de tine ca esti cuvantu ala din 3 litere care incepe cu G si se termina in AY -) si ca iti plac baietii -



Code:
* Last result: 76 hit(s), 7073 damage >> head: 38 chest: 13 stomach: 4 leftarm: 15 rightarm: 5 leftleg: 6


Ura Ramane Cel Mai Sincer Sentiment , Pana In Prezent.
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-bebeto-

[Freakz * -carmen-]



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Post Posted: 22-11-2013, 16:53:24 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)

Un oltean intra într-o frizerie si-l întreaba pe frizer:
-Cât face la dumneata un tuns?
-5.000, domnule!
-Dar un barbierit?
-Doar 2.500.
-Atunci barbiereste-ma în cap!



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DeathLine

[Banal]



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Post Posted: 22-11-2013, 19:15:53 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)

MIT 29` wrote:



Uite Pica Sa nu mai vorbeasca lumea de tine ca esti cuvantu ala din 3 litere care incepe cu G si se termina in AY -) si ca iti plac baietii -


hahahahhaahhahahahha EPIC!
- - -




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Schwarzenegger77

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Post Posted: 26-11-2013, 19:45:30 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)

Tare ! -
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-bebeto-

[Freakz * -carmen-]



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Post Posted: 27-11-2013, 10:50:01 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)

Sotia: Ai facut cumparaturile?
Sotul: Bad command or filename.
Sotia: Dar te-am rugat de dimineata.
Sotul: Syntax Error. Abort?
Sotia: Nici macar noul televizor?
Sotul: Variable not found.
Sotia: Bine, da-mi cartea de credit, merg eu la cumparaturi!
Sotul: Sharing Violation. Access denied!
Sotia: Tu vorbesti serios, glumesti sau incerci sa ma enervezi?
Sotul: Too many parameters...
Sotia: Cum de m-am maritat eu tocmai cu
tine?
Sotul: Data type mismatch.
Sotia: Dar salariul cand il iei?
Sotul: File in use. Try later.
Sotia: Ma faci sa ma intreb... ce insemn eu pentru tine?
Sotul: Unknown Virus



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chetrue

[Unstoppable !!]



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Post Posted: 29-11-2013, 10:41:49 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)

Dumnezeu il trimite pe Sf. Petru sa vada ce fac studentii de la diferite facultati..se intoarce Sf. Petru si da raportul:
- Studentii de la medicina invata pe rupte
- Studentii de la ase invata pe rupte
- Studentii de la politehnica dau petreceri, beau si se distreaza..
…dupa o vreme, Dumnezeu iar il trimite pe Sf. Petru pt aceeasi chestie..vine Sf. Petru si ii zice:
- Studentii de la medicina nu stiu altceva decat sa invete..
- Aia de la ase la fel
- Aia de la politehnica petrec de zori..
..in sesiune iar il trimite Dumnezeu pe Petru sa verifice..
- Studentii de la medicina stau treji nopti intregi ca sa invete
- Aia de la ase la fel
- Aia de la politehnica se roaga
Dumnezeu:
- BUN! P-astia ii trecem!



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evil_dufalshmitz

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Post Posted: 01-12-2013, 20:55:40 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)

O tiganca vindea seminte. Langa ea 3 puradei.
La un moment dat aceasta le spune:
-Mai puneti si voi mana pe carte! Faceti-mi cornete.


10% luck. 20%skill. 15% concentrated power of will. 5% pleasure. 50% pain.100% reason to remember the name : 1`st Evil#
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-bebeto-

[Freakz * -carmen-]



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Post Posted: 01-12-2013, 20:57:45 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)

Un poliþai opreºte o Dacie ºi îl da jos pe ºofer: - Bunã ziua! Plutonier major X-ulescu. Vã felicit! Sunteþi singurul conducator auto pe care l-am gãsit purtând centura de siguranþã! Ca sã încurajãm ºi noi cumva obiceiul acesta atât de bun totuºi, Ministerul de Interne vã oferã un premiu de 50 milioane lei. Dar, auziþi, ca de la om la om, ce faceþi cu banii? - Pai... cred ca am sã fac ºi eu ºcoala de ºoferi... Mama ºoferului: - Dom' poliþai! Nu-l luaþi în seamã, e beat mort, vorbeºte prostii! Tatãl ºoferului, de pe bancheta din spate: - Bãi nenorocitule, ne faci numai probleme, þi-am spus de atâtea ori sã nu mai furi maºini care bat la ochi! Fratele soferului, ieºind tiptil din portbagaj: - Bãi, care-i treaba, am trecut graniþa?


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DaNNNut

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Post Posted: 02-12-2013, 19:46:47 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)

Banc sec. Bula se duce la magazin si cumpara paine. -
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chetrue

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Post Posted: 02-12-2013, 20:26:16 | Translate post to: ... (Click for more languages)

O grupa de blonde - studente la universitate - au primit sarcina de a masura inaltimea catargului de arborare a drapelului. Luand cu ele scari,rulete de masurat,ele au mers catre catarg si au inceput a masura,cazand de pe scari,scapand ruletele si,in genere ,producand un haos enorm.
Trecand pe alaturi,un student al facultatii de inginerie,hotarand sa le ajute,s-a apropiat,a scos catargul din pamant,l-a culcat la pamant,l-a masurat cu ruleta si,transmitand rezultatul blondelor,s-a dus in treaba lui.
Blondele s-au uitat una la alta,au ras,iar una ii spune alteia :
- Iata asa, ca intotdeauna,inginerii astia prosti. Noi avem nevoie de inaltime si el a masurat lungimea. -)



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